How do you know...

Jag: I need you to promise me something.
M: What?
Jag: That you won´t, under any circumstances, touch my golden egg when you´re drunk. It´s very precious to me.
M: Only if you promise something in return...
Jag: Alright?
M: If you see me creating a havoc...
Jag: Mmmm
M: I want you to step in and tell me to shut up...
Jag: Ok.
M: Then I want you to take my hand, look into my eyes and say: "Darling, let´s just go home now."

Jag: (Silently)...how to push exactly the right buttons?