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måndag 23 december 2013

Words in September

You leave me without any skin. You leave me broken and cracked and shivering. On a floor somewhere in the west, with a breaking heart and thoughts that threaten to choke me. Because you don't love me, you never did, always wanted to, but never could. And right here, is where I stop trying to understand. Right here, is where I realize that it is time to get on with things. And so I keep breathing. And so I keep existing. And so I keep feeling. So I embrace the emptiness you left behind. Through all the millions of little cracks where you used to be.

I will live sweetie-pants. Still.

Ane Brun – Halo

fredag 20 december 2013

Then

When all else fades and what is left is simply you and him. Those few trembling seconds when you turn around and find that he is talking to you and everything in you becomes very, very still. It suddenly doesn't matter that you have a long workday ahead of you. It suddenly is irrelevant that clients will scream at you and colleagues will demand the impossible. It makes no difference that he grew up in Melbourne and you in the smallest town in southern Sweden. Because all of a sudden you are back in tenth grade, and his eyes are blue just like back then -- but his hair is much darker. And just like then you've watched his smile with wonder for a while. Suddenly, you are just a girl and he is just a boy, and you both say all the wrong things and it just doesn't matter that you both stutter and blush and fumble for words that slip away too fast. You don't know what will happen next. You have no idea what to do with what you are feeling because it is always new, every time. All that matters is that at this moment...

you watch it begin again.

onsdag 11 december 2013

Voice

It was just a glimpse of pain. It was just one shot, one bolt through me. As I walked through Sainsbury's for my carrots and tomatoes, my humus and my eggs. The notes hit me, like a whip on naked skin and I felt something instantly snap in my chest. For a second, my heart was broken again. I remembered us dancing down the street as the pale morning light spread silently over the rooftops of my town. I remember jumping a fence, being caught by you on the other side -- the feeling of being at home, completely at home and the best me I could ever be. I remember waking up early, too early, not knowing where my dreams ended and reality began. I missed you then, for just that one intense second. The hurt was completely unbearable, for that one moment. And suddenly I saw nothing but starry nights and fairy dust and the mist seething over an emerald green isle, on a coast facing the Atlantic ocean.

Those notes, those fucking notes...

Breabach – Baby Broon's