My Keeper of Truths

To be someone’s diamond, someone’s gem, the apple of someone’s eye – in a harsh world made of concrete and rock. How could I have been so lucky?

 

I miss your smile. I miss your touch, your relentless loyalty, your enigmatic, inspirational words and your soft caress. But more than anything I miss your eyes on me, making me feel like I am the golden girl with all the answers. (I have none.)

 

I love you to the end and back again; the world will go on because it must, but there is a hole in my heart that will remain until the end. There is no way to fill it as you move though time.

 

When I close my eyes I can just about see your contours, shiny and sparkly like a thousand stars; your red shoes, your blues and reds and lilacs and your dazzling smile promising me freedom. When I close my eyes I can feel my heart skip a beat at the sound of your voice, the touch of your hands on my pale skin - but it’s all just a dream.

 

I am wounded now (and you know it). I am hurting now (and you know it). I am lost and lonely now (the cut you left behind is so deep), tormented by the knowledge that my love can’t bring you back, not this time – you have moved beyond my grasp.

 

As the tears stream down my face I feel the relentlessness of my loss, the purity of emotion. I am left with one thought (and you planted it a long time ago).

 

Get to the other side!

 

I don’t know how I’ll do it yet, but I have the strength of your blood running through my veins, so I’ll get there.

 

All the while, I can feel your spirit echo through me.

 

I love you.